popsicle
mommy not looking
Babel Aftermath |
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H: Apple!
me: No, this is an orange! A clementine, actually. Mmm. It tastes nice. H: Niiice baby. Niiice dog dog. Dog dog night night? Owie night night. Owie BALLOON!! me: Where's your balloon? H: pointing Balloon!!! This was part of our conversation over breakfast. One of the things I learned in grad school that stuck with me the most was that language acquisition is a mystery. No one understands just how babies and toddlers go about mastering thousands of words and really complex grammatical structures in a few short years. They follow examples for sure, but there's no way they could hear enough examples of all of the grammar they end up learning in order to explain it that way. Noam Chomsky said that our brains are hard wired to learn language and that we have a little black box in there that gets activated in early childhood by hearing language around us. But how exactly something like that would work? No one knows. Other linguists, education psychologists, sociologists, and philosophers have their own theories, and they might explain parts of the process, but overall it is still a mystery. Hendrik is putting two word phrases together, and it's so much fun to see it develop. I would say that while his language has a small vocabulary as of yet, it is very rich with inflections. So when he says Night night Daddy, it can mean Daddy's sleeping, I'm tired, where's my blanket, and probably other stuff too. It keeps us on our toes guessing what he means. Oh! And I am happy to announce that I have now been "Mama" or sometimes "Mommy" consistently for several weeks! Up until now I have answered to Daddy. I guess Hendrik has seen me as an extension of his much funner daddy. I love seeing the wheels in his head turn. When he learns a new word he will practice it over and over-- for the last little while he's been saying eyeBROW (only, it comes out more as eyeBWOW) and pointing to everyone's eyebrows. I'll catch him reading a book to himself and it sounds something like this: "Dog dog night night, baby night night, DOG DOG. Mama. Daddy. Baby. EYEBWOW. Balloon!" One night at dinner he pointed to my nearly empty plate and said, "All gone [ahguh] Mama." Then he went around and plugged in other people for all the other permutations: All gone baby, all gone Daddy, all gone Owie, all gone balloon, all gone bee... When he figures out an expression, I hear him for a day or two talking to himself and saying all the possible combinations out loud. Usually while he's running after the balloon or reading a book about a dog. So, when you come over and hang out with Hendrik, don't be surprised if the conversation revolves around the activities of some dog dogs, the whereabouts of the bee, and whether or not you've finished all your food. He will love you for understanding some weighty issues in his world! This one's for you, Val.
One of the most amazing privileges of having children is being able to choose a name for them. In my college days, English major that I was, I envisioned naming any future children after literary characters that I loved. Or giving them names with a meaning in English. Or choosing some interesting name from another language. Every now and then I'd think something like this: "Ooh. I like the name Carraway for a son-- Nick Carraway is such a great character." Other names I've always liked: Scout, Justice, Milagros, Banner, Pilgrim... And then I got married, and I got a taste of what it is to revise your previous dreams to make new ones with your husband, who definitely was not an English major and did not appreciate all the, ahem, creativity. Even in naming our dog we ran into what would become our classic battle: he said all the names I liked were weird hippie names, and I thought all the names he liked were boring. After a while it became sort of fun to see why we would reject each other's choices. Dirk: Seth? No way. It makes me think of brown. Me: Blake? It sounds too much like flake. Flaky Blakey. Add on to this the fun challenge of finding one that sounded good with our last name (which, don't get me wrong, I love! I like having a unique name!), and I really wondered if we would ever find something that would work for our first son. After months of going around and around, we looked at some Dutch names. We figured why not embrace the last name and give the boy a chance to blend in if he ever wanted to go to the Netherlands... or South Africa... It would be a neat way to have a name similar to his dad's but not exactly the same. And so we finally decided on Hendrik, the Dutch version of Henry. The name means "home ruler," and we pray that he would be a godly man and a leader in his home someday. His middle name is James, which honestly we chose because we had been looking for a Bible name and liked how it sounded together. The history of the name Henry is pretty cool, too, since it was taken to England by the French during the Norman Conquest. As my maiden name was Norman, I feel tied to greatness right there. Fast forward to finding out son #2 was on the way. We sort of half heartedly went through name lists again, mostly rejecting each other's. And then to our surprise we happened across the name Levi, which we both really liked. It means "joined together in harmony," which I feel is an apt description of our marriage and our little family right now. I also really like the Hebrew/Spanish/Dutch pronunciation (Leh-vee). Dirk liked it for those reasons and also because he saw it on a list of names that are currently popular in the Netherlands. So, you know, a strong Hebrew name for a little American boy who's also got lots of Dutch in him. We chose Thomas for the middle name, liking how it sounds, and also how Jesus was so gracious to Thomas in the Bible and helped him believe. We pray little Levi will be a strong man who runs to the Father for help and through whom peace and harmony flow to others. So. Even I admit it's probably a good thing I wasn't left alone to choose names for our boys. One of them might have ended up as Carraway! Yikes. Hmm, that makes me realize, I never did explore all the options in the spice cabinet... Maybe if we are blessed again I can talk Dirk into an edible name. :) It's been a week already!
This little munchkin was due today, but he made his appearance on Sunday the 17th. I wanted to make sure and write about his birth before all the details get fuzzy, and since Levi has been awake all of 10 minutes this morning and his older brother is sleeping, this is the perfect chance. When I was pregnant with Hendrik, I never really got to the point where I was ready for him to come. In general, yeah, but he came in a hurry when we thought we still had a few weeks left. I was lucky the hospital bag was packed and the camera battery charged! Nothing else was ready. So after that I figured I needed to be ready for Levi to come early. We got up to the point where Hendrik had come, and no baby, and then a week later, and no baby... I had figured the timing would be perfect for him to come on Saturday the 9th, or the next day. Well, when he didn't cooperate, I was so sad because Dirk had a very busy work week coming up and it would be hard for him to miss at all. It was just one more thing to be anxious about, along with figuring out where to take Hendrik (different possibilities depending on what day/what time of day it was), and whether or not I'd get to the hospital soon enough or be able to handle the pain of labor and delivery. All week my students said, "You again??" every day and asked me multiple times when the baby would come. I was pretty irritable about that. Finally we made it to Friday night, and we went out to eat. We were both hoping for a baby over the weekend. Later that night I got sick and felt sick all day on Saturday-- I hoped it was a sign of pre-labor, but it seemed more like a tummy bug. Finally on Saturday night I felt a little better, and after Dirk took me on a walk to help me calm down and not be so anxious, we all went to bed early. On Sundays we usually get up with just enough time to get dressed and go to the early service at church. As we were driving to church, I felt a painful contraction-- my first one. I figured if there were any more I'd time them. I did, all through the service, and they were 7 minutes apart and getting closer. In a small miracle, my doctor was sitting right in front of us with his family, and after the service I talked to him briefly-- my instructions: call him and go in when the contractions got to be 5 minutes apart. So we went home. I hopped on the treadmill for 30 minutes-- I did not want the contractions to dissipate! After about an hour and a half we were on our way to Hendrik's regular baby-sitter's and the hospital. Checked in at the hospital-- 12:25. Got wheeled downstairs and found out I was at 7 with a bulging sac. My wonderful doctor came in, broke my water, and said there would be a baby within an hour! I turned down pain medication (hesitantly!), but I don't think it would have really kicked in anyway, because Levi was born 20-30 minutes later at 1:24. That last half hour was quite painful, but it was only half an hour. For all of my worrying and fretting, Levi arrived on the perfect day-- we made contact with the doctor at church, the baby-sitting was perfect, Dirk was here for everything, and his parents made it just after the baby came to come visit and to take Hendrik home with them for several days. God was so good to us! And I had been so fragile about how he was coming later than Hendrik had (18 days before the due date, while Levi came 8 days early), but you know what? They had exactly the same measurements, except Levi was 1/4" shorter. So he cooked just long enough. I was nervous about the pain of labor and delivery, and it was definitely very painful. But it was short, and God walked me through it. I am so blessed to see God's loving hand in this story. Since then Levi has been a sleepy head. Hendrik came home on Saturday night and has been talking and talking about the baby. He's been really gentle with him too, except when he tries to use Levi's head as a support to help him climb on the couch. Such is the unglamorous life of a younger sibling. Welcome, Mr. Levi Thomas! We are thrilled to have you here! The last few years of July 4ths for us:
3 years ago we sadly wondered if we would ever become parents 2 years ago we found out a baby was on the way and today we caught a glimpse of Hendrik's little brother for the first time! feeling blessed beyond measure :) A lot of firsts around here... On Hendrik's part: first time in the little pool, first bike ride (just around the block to try out the new seat!), first haircut, first time climbing to the top of the little slide and going down all by himself. Also, tonight was his first junior high band/orchestra concert. He spent most of the time crawling up the bleachers right around me. I don't think he noticed that each time he got to the one right above where I was sitting I picked him up and put him two rows down. He kept climbing those three rows so happily like he was really going somewhere. Who's that dude in mythology with the rock? Sisyphus? Hendrik is my cheerful little existentialist. I had a lapse in judgment and let him wear his squeaky sandals, which weren't an issue during the loud band, but I had to take them off during the orchestra part. *blush* I should've known better. He loves those sandals. Dirk: first time since we've been married that he has had a beard. Isn't he handsome?? For Shelby: first weekend with her new owners, who have several acres and lots of raccoons to chase. They are thrilled with her, and we are a bit wistful at saying bye to Hendrik's dog-dog but glad to send her to a home where she can run and explore a bigger backyard.
And for me: first time truly feeling a connection with a student who has been difficult all year. This student has fought me every step of the way as I've tried to help with her schoolwork. She has gotten into fights, failed important classes needlessly, cussed me out in a couple languages, acted belligerently, and brought others in the class down. I have reached the end of my patience with her more than once over the year. But today in a lengthy meeting with some authority figures she turned to me and started to cry and said that at night sometimes she thinks of me and feels sorry for how she acts because I am the only teacher who cares about her. She asked for my forgiveness. And I was so happy to give it and to assure her that there are fresh starts and that next year will be better. She will still pay consequences for what has happened, but it is in the past. Of course it might all start up again tomorrow, but for today I am glad to be reminded of new beginnings and forgiveness and the prodigal's dad running to meet him in great joy. April has been a frustrating month so far. This week is a good example-- last Sunday was our first really warm, sunny day in quite a while, and Monday was ok too. But then it got cold, and we saw snow flurries again. So about once a week we get to see the sun and go outside and play, and then the rest of the week it's cold and rainy, like a never-ending February. All for May flowers, I guess. My classroom has windows, and the students make sure to let me know if it's snowing-- "Aww, you gotta be kidding me! NOOOO!!!" The other night Dirk and I braved the rain for our nightly walk. We both had umbrellas. Hendrik was in the stroller with a rain cover (which didn't actually cover his feet, and despite his blanket he still got some chilly toes, poor guy), and Shelby came along in her new head collar. It's fantastic. We laughed about how we must look and wondered if anyone was going to stop and offer to help us. But no one did, thank goodness. Yesterday we went down to see family, and we had so much fun. It was a nice spring day, and there were good conversations and time outside and a wagon ride and too many dogs... Now the countdown begins (continues!) for the end of the school year. 5 weeks left. This year has been quite stressful for me and for most of the teachers in Indiana because of the new laws about teacher evaluations. Some genius politician businesspeople decided that education would be better if it followed a business model-- teachers are now evaluated based on their students' performance on tests. If a teacher can't demonstrate that they are teaching effectively through their students' scores, they get a year of probation. If the same thing happens the next year, they lose their job.
Sure seems like a great way to whip lazy public school teachers into shape, huh. And if they teach a subject like mine, where students by definition do badly on tests, well, some improvement still has to be there. At the same time that the laws are being passed about student test data for teacher evaluations, additional laws are being passed lowering the bar to become a teacher and administrator. Starting a year or two ago, there is no financial incentive for teachers to go on for additional training. Getting a masters' degree really helps you build knowledge in a content area, but it counts for squat now. They are also making it much easier to get licenses, and there's talk that in the future all you'll need to do to get a teacher's license is to pass the Praxis test in the subject area. (Not to toot my own horn, but I could have passed the English one in high school. It's not super difficult.) The Indiana legislature has sent this message to teachers: Your "profession" is nothing special-- anyone with half a brain can do it, and by the way, your success at it is largely out of your hands, because it depends on how well your students pass a test. It's not quite as bleak as that sounds-- less than half of our evaluation is based on student test data, and our administrators are encouraging us to submit documents to show that we meet the criteria they evaluate us on. But still, it has been a stressful year. I'm hoping that I get an ok evaluation (you are either "effective" and get a raise or "not effective" and get put on probation), but I have zero control over the testing outcome, since it's a standard test that all English Language Learners take once a year. Hopefully next year we will all come to our senses and use a model that is a little less ulcer-inducing. On top of that, we've had to line up alternate childcare for Hendrik. His regular baby-sitter, who I love (purposely didn't use whom there, but I still would've passed that test!), has been away in Mexico on a family medical emergency for 2 months. It just got to be too much for the friend I had been taking him to. I have found people to watch him until the end of the school year, but I don't know what will happen after that. Trying not to fixate on it. Ready for some spring weather and sunshine and a break from school! He will claim His lost possession
Repossess you pay the cost He will purchase you for freedom He will find all that was lost... So run and tell all Those who have longed to hear The wait is over The Risen Savior's here --Michael Card, "All That Was Lost" Blessings to you this Easter! May you be filled with joy, amazement, and thankfulness at how Jesus suffered our death sentence so we wouldn't have to and made a way for us to be with right with God. Some thoughts about holidays... We love Christmas and celebrating Jesus' fragile coming as a baby-- everything is new and innocent and tentative. We think about that little baby and Mary and Joseph going to great extremes to keep him safe, and there are ominous notes underneath the sweetness because we know the plan. But Easter comes after the worst had happened, after it seemed all was lost, after Jesus was betrayed, made fun of, tortured, and killed. And then, in the bleakest situation, a most unexpected miracle happened. As Jesus showed himself to the disciples, their hearts must have "leaped, and a wild hope rose within them" (C.S. Lewis, The Last Battle). Jesus being risen makes all the difference. So while Christmas is a long-awaited arrival, Easter is an unparalleled victory. Hallelujah! We worshiped and celebrated at church, then came home and celebrated as a family. I made my first whole holiday meal and only got kitchen grumpy at the end. I did get two cuts and a burn in the process, but nothing serious. Hendrik did an Easter egg hunt in the backyard on Dirk's shoulders... He's not walking yet, and we didn't want him crawling around outside in the wet yard. Hendrik liked the eggs. A few of them had a jelly bean, but most of them had a couple of raisins or a peanut butter cracker. Later in the evening we had a slaphappy baby. Maybe five jellybeans was too many. Happy Easter once again. He is risen, risen indeed! *this post is dedicated to Mark, who suggested the title* :) Hendrik is hitting this stage that I think is technically called Explosion of Cuteness. He is so interested in the world around him, and he's beginning to use more words. Just the other day I got out his ball and asked him to say "ball" and he replied with "ga!" But the rest of that day and ever since he has consistently called his ball ga. Cool! Part of the Cuteness Explosion is that he is using more vowels. Whereas before he could only really do the a ones (like in dada and dog dog), but now he can do ai (hi!) and o (he has this cute surprised "oh!" sound that he uses whenever something amazes him, which is about once every five minutes). You can hear it in this video, and at the end you can see that he gets tired of talking to me and wants to see what Shelby, our dog dog, is up to. This last week was my spring break from school, so I got to be with Hendrik all week. We had so much fun! Here's some of the stuff we did....
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